Tuesday, November 3, 2009

I Have Goals and Aspirations Too

Don't tell my children, but I daydream sometimes about returning to work. I reminisce about the days when I was paid handsomely for 2-hour lunches, solo bathroom breaks and leisure time behind my computer. Oh sure, I thought I was busy at work. I would have been seriously offended if you ever suggested otherwise. But, now I know better. I became a mother. And, busy doesn't even begin to describe my day which starts at 5:15 am and ends around, well...does it ever really end?

So, sometimes I daydream about work. I think a little extra money in my pocket would be great. I think that using my brain for something other than umpteen Candy Land or hide-and-go-seek games seems thrilling. I even think that I would be a better employee now that I have multi-tasked my way into power-mom status. Actually, just a simple distraction from the more mundane chores of my day would be a welcome relief.

But, after taking all of that into consideration I remind myself that my greatest accomplishment thus far is being a mother. No other "job" has ever brought me so much satisfaction or made me as proud. When I worked I was always striving for my boss's and co-worker's approval. I was always yearning for accolades about how well I did my job. Now, when I hear my son say, "you are the best mom in the whole world" or when he hugs me so tight I think I might burst I know that I am doing a good job. Nobody has to give me a performance review. No one has to send me a congratulatory email. My kids remind me daily with their "I love yous" and their bright, confident smiles.

So, yes, I have goals and aspirations beyond motherhood. I would love to be a published writer someday. I would love to earn a paycheck. But, I also want to continue to be the parent at the bus stop every morning and the one who greets my kids after school. I want to be the PTA volunteer who attends all the school fairs and fund-raising drives. I want to participate in classroom activities so my kids know that I value their time and effort. I overheard Nicholas telling his friends that I was volunteering for the recent fall fair at his school and he sounded so proud. My rewards don't come in the form of a paycheck, they come in waves of adoration and love.

So, daydreaming about work will stay at the daydreaming stage for now because I have more important things to take care of. Like accompanying my son on his field trip or helping his teacher with her classroom website. Don't assume that because I am a stay-at-home mom that I have nothing to do all day. I won't bore you with my to-do list because it's too damn long. Just know that I am, and have been, preparing my kids to be confident, generous, kind, polite, educated human beings. I take my job seriously.

And it's the best job in the world.

3 comments:

Jenna said...

And you do a very good job at it...you're boys are the best!!

I love being home with my boys but I too daydream about the pre-kid days when I thought I was so "busy" with work.

Mommy on the Spot said...

It's not that I daydream about going back to work because I was not so happy there. But I did feel like something was missing. Oh, that would be mental stimulation! That is why I blog now. That and I love to write and connect with others.

I really do feel there is nothing more important that being a great mom!

Kim Murray said...

Thank you Jenna!

Mommy-on-the-spot, yes, mental stimulation can be sorely missed. But, again, kids area a great trade off!

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